A
Little Before Death
Shortly
before the year 2000, my mother came over to my house and said, “Son, a few
blocks away there is a distressed family with two elementary school girls. They
need to live with their grandmother because they are going through a terrible
ordeal. Their father, who is about your age, is a drug addict. I know his
mother. Please drop by to see what you can do, because his wife and his mother
told me that he is in his last days.”
“And
what do you think I can do, mum? I can hardly keep up with my own dirty messes,
and now all of a sudden you think I can help others?”
“Come
on, my boy, you need to go; please, don’t upset me.”
The
next day, I complied with my mother’s wish. With the blessing of my mother and
my spiritual father, I prayed briefly and said, “My Panagia, I will go, but you
lead and I will follow.” When I arrived at the home, his mother welcomed me
with a hug and a kiss. Then she drew me aside, and while she wept, she
explained her Golgotha and the heavy cross the entire family had had to bear.
As she was unfolding their very painful family drama to me, occasionally, she
would use her apron to wipe her eyes. The poor woman had suffered so much all
these years. She had gone to various neighbourhoods and local businesses to
borrow money to help her son get his drugs. What pain this mother had endured!
What a Golgotha! What crises families in similar situations must be going
through! I couldn't endure so much pain. I hugged her, and told her to have her
hope and faith in Christ. When I went to the other room, and I saw her son
lying in bed, the truth is that I wasn't prepared for it; I was shocked. I went
to give him my hand, but he couldn't even exchange a handshake, because his
fingers had become deformed. I grabbed him from the wrist and attempted to
speak to him, but he would fade in and out of consciousness. With a little
patience, however, we became acquainted and shared a few words.
“My
brother, I am your neighbour,” I told him “I don’t know you, of course, but you
don't know me either. So, since we have become acquainted now, what do you say,
can we help one another?”
“It’s
too late for me, Thanasi,” he told me in a whispering voice, “I am in the last
stage. There is no recovery for me. The doctors can't do anything.”
“Humanly,
yes, we agree, but don’t forget the power and grace of our God; what is
impossible for man is possible for God” (cf. Luke 18:27).
“I
believe in God, Thanasi, but I have fallen into a snake pit. I have made
repeated efforts to detoxify myself for many years now but all in vain. I know
that I upset my mother, my wife and especially my children. What can I do? I'm
not to blame. It’s the deprivation of heroin.”
“So
fine, since you believe that you are in a pit with snakes, stretch out your
hand and ask the help of Christ. He is the only one who is able to take you out
of this pit.”
“What
must I do; and how?”
And
he faded out again. I needed to wait a few minutes, for him to regain
consciousness. In the meantime, I prayed and said, “My Christ, is he listening
to what I’m telling him? Can he even think, understand, or remember? Please
Lord, only You are able to help us, especially me.” A few moments later, he
opened his eyes, and we spoke a bit more. In the end I told him, “I need to
leave you now, my brother. The next time I come, if you like, I can bring a
priest to read some prayers over you. I think this will do you much good.”
“Yes,
Thanasi, I will wait for you. Bring the priest also. I don’t have a problem
with that.”
When
I came out of the room, there in the hall, I met his wife and their two
charming little girls for the first time. They had red swollen eyes. As soon as
they saw me they lowered their heads, probably out of shame for the condition
of their father. I don’t know, but my heart went out to these little innocent
girls; I shared their pain and loved them very much from the first moment. I
talked for quite a while with his wife. We said many things, and the poor woman
was constantly crying. I left in shambles.
Two
days later, I went to his home with a priest, and he read some prayers of Saint
Basil over him. I will not forget that I needed to hold him from the shoulder,
so he wouldn't fall down. At the end, we told him what his next steps were. He
needed to go confess with sincere repentance, to be able to commune, to take
Christ in him so that he could be strengthened.
By
the grace of God, my friends, he accepted all this joyfully. Not only he, but
his entire family, even his little girls came and confessed to Father , filled
with joy and hope for a new beginning. When everyone was finished, Father pulled me aside and told me, “Thanasi,
this man needs all the help he can get; do as much as you can for him, because
he is in dire straits, he is not at all well. He needs to recover for the sake
of his family. Under the circumstances, he has my blessing to receive Holy
Communion whenever he is able.”
“Yes
father, he’s going down fast, but please let me share a thought with you.”
“Go
ahead, speak up.”
“This
coming Sunday, I am thinking of going to church as a family to the monastery of
Saint Nicodemos at Goumenissa. I will go with Glykeria, and the young man and
his wife. Allow me also to take my friend Savvas, the paralytic, with me, so he
can envelop us in prayer. On Monday, with your blessing, I'd like for all three
of us to venture to the Monastery of Vatopedi, Mount Athos, for all of us to
venerate the Precious Belt of our Panagia. I will make all the necessary
arrangements with the fathers.”
“Very
well, but are you sure you can manage all this?”
“I
cannot without God’s grace and your blessing and prayers.”
“Do
accordingly, however God enlightens you. As far as I am concerned I bless you
with all my heart.”
Then
I proceeded to relay to the lad and his wife my ideas, to see if they would
agree. They joyfully accepted my suggestions, especially his wife who responded
with tears of joy, perhaps because a gleam of hope was finally on the horizon.
I then turned to her husband and firmly told him, “My brother, I ask you, and I
beg you. Between now and Sunday, while preparing yourself for Holy Communion at
St. Nicodemos monastery and during the days of our pilgrimage to Mount Athos, don’t even think
about using heroin.”
“Listen,
Thanasi, I will speak to you with all sincerity, especially since I just
confessed. I give you my word, here and in the presence of my wife, that I will
not use heroin. I will take some kind of opiate substitute, so that I can stand
on my feet. If I don’t do this, my bones will be creaking. My temple blood
vessels will begin to burst; I will scream uncontrollably, because the pain is
excruciating at the final stage of heroin addiction.”
“What
are these substitutes?”
“Mr.
Thanasi, don’t worry. I will be very careful, and I will not let him leave from
my sight. I promise you,” his wife told me.
So,
early Sunday morning, we all headed out. Savvas, my paralytic friend, was
sitting in the front seat, and I asked him to pray unceasingly. The young man
in the back however was sweating profusely and nonstop. The sweating continued
and several times during the Divine Liturgy we had to exit the Church so he
could catch his breath. I made sure always to be at his side to console him and
help him as needed.
Soon
enough, the voice of the priest was heard, “With the fear of God, with faith
and love, draw near”; I held him by the arm and we waited for all others to
commune first. Then as we slowly walked towards the chalice, I turned to the
large icon of the Virgin Mary and silently asked her, “My Virgin Mary, please,
help us to commune today and be with us as we travel to your perivoli[2] tomorrow." It seems that my
prayer was heard.
That
morning, everything went well at the monastery, thank God. The Abbot, who
sensed the gravity of the situation, and learned that we would be leaving the
next day for the Holy Mountain, was quite moved. Upon our departure, he walked
towards the lad and prayed and said in a loud voice, “May Angels accompany you."
His poor wife couldn’t control her tears all day long.
The
next morning, we took a taxi, and all three of us arrived at the bus station[3].
I helped the young man onto the bus, and guided him to the open seats toward
the back. I then lifted Savva the paralytic on my back, carried him onto the
bus and placed him next to the young man. I reminded Savva to continue with
unceasing prayer.
While
on the bus and later on the ferry boat, we were able to discuss various nice
things. The lad was listening to me carefully although he was sweating quite a
bit due to acute withdrawal symptoms. He was constantly wiping his sweat, and
he struggled to stay on his feet. In less than two hours we disembarked and
continued on a minibus towards Vatopedi. The driver dropped us off a few
hundred yards outside of the monastery. I looked around for some help but there
was no one in sight. It was very difficult to roll the wheelchair on an uphill
gravel road. I remember holding the lad with one hand, and pushing the
wheelchair with the other. I will not be ashamed to tell you that my tears were
running, while I was pleading to the Virgin Mary, silently saying to her, “My
dear Mother, help me first, and then my brethren because I am the sickest one
of all." When we entered inside the gates of monastery, it was noon, and
everyone was resting. There were many stairs for us to climb. I first helped
the lad up the stairs and then I lifted up the paralytic on my shoulders since
there was no other solution at the moment. Finally I went back down once more
to bring up the wheelchair.
When
we found the Archondari[4],
he received us with much love. We had notified the fathers about the purpose of
our visit a few days prior. They were happy to see us because Savvas and I had
visited Vatopedi before.
When
we got settled in a room, another monk came and told me, “Thanasi, the Geronda (Abbot) wants to see you." I
immediately went to him, did a prostration and received his blessing. We talked
for quite a while, about the condition of the lad. The Abbot was very moved,
asked that we write down our names, and promised to commemorate us during forty
successive liturgies[5].
He asked us to come to one of the chapels in the afternoon, to venerate the
Holy Relics and the Precious Belt (of the Virgin Mary). Upon entering the
church, the father told the lad to kneel so that he could place the Precious
Belt on his head, and to pray over him. I sat back and savoured every second of
this most beautiful hour. These were truly heavenly moments. When the priest
finished with the young man he asked the paralytic to bow and receive the
Precious Belt on his head as well. Then the father took the Belt, and went to
leave. While he was preparing to depart, I asked him, “Father, please, don’t
deprive me of this blessing, because I am the sickest one in the group. My body
is healthy, but my soul is paralysed." The father turned back, looked at
me with a blank stare, and asked, “What’s your name, my son?”
“Thanasi.”
The
very Belt of the Virgin Mary was now resting on my head! What an indescribable
feeling this was. I have no words even to begin to tell you what this felt
like. Even if I did, you would not be able to understand it.
This
was such an uplifting and truly beneficial pilgrimage. When we returned home, I
went to find Father, to inform him how things went. He was very pleased and
said, “Thanasi, don’t worry, the Virgin Mary will do her miracle." After
this the recovering young man, stayed close to Fr. Triantafyllos[7] and continued to go to holy
Confession, with his entire family.
Now,
I am sure you are probably anxious to find out what happened to this young man
and his family. Well, he is well, very well. The same man who could hardly even
exchange a handshake, nor stand on his feet without being held, now returned to
his old job of hard physical labour, and even works overtime. The smile
returned to his family, especially to his charming little girls. They were no
longer ashamed of their father at school. More importantly, he returned to our
Christ. For this we are ever so grateful to the blessing of our Virgin Mary, to
the supplications of the fathers, and to the prayer of the paralytic.
[1] The irony is that most people
come to this sad position because of these prescribed painkillers. Dentists and
doctors often overprescribe opium derivatives such as oxycodone (OxyContin,
Percocet), hydrocodone (Vicodin, Norco), codeine, morphine, etc., for pain
management. These are usually highly addictive and when these prescriptions
expire, a high percentage of their victims turn to heroin which is rather
inexpensive in its beginning stages but later becomes very costly and deadly as
its addictive qualities totally enslave the human organism. Overdosing is now
the leading cause of accidental death in the United States, accounting for more
deaths than traffic fatalities or gun homicides and suicides. Fatal overdoses
from opiate medications such as oxycodone, hydrocodone, and methadone have
quadrupled since 1999, accounting for an estimated 16,651 deaths in 2010.
[2] According to tradition the
Virgin Mary and St. John the Evangelist were on a ship to visit Lazarus who was
serving as a Bishop in Cyprus. Along the way, the weather became severe, and
the swollen waves carried the boat north to the present location of the
monastery of Iveron, on the Athonite peninsula. The Virgin Mary was truly
enchanted by the paradisiacal beauty of this location so she asked her Son to
gift it to her. This is why, to this day, the Holy Mountain is the exclusive
“Garden of the Panagia” and no other female-human or animal-is permitted to set
foot on it.
[3] Mt. Athos is not accessible
by land so visitors and pilgrims must travel to Ouranoupolis (150 km from
Thessaloniki), the last seaport with frequent ferry boat rides to Dafne, the
central access point to the one-thousand year-old monastic community with
twenty major monasteries and their dependencies. At present there are
approximately 2000 monks on the Holy Mountain.
[6] Thanasi, the nickname for
Athanasios (immortal), changes the meaning of this dogmatic Christian name from
immortal to mortal. This is precisely why the Father used Athanasi’s baptismal
name.
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